The Full Truth - With Compassion

For those who know me well, it is just a simple fact that I aspire towards utter honesty, and I dislike word games; if it isn't straight shot I tend to get twitchy. I don't easily abide people who flower up their words to play at armchair philosophy or poet. It is extremely dishonest to me, and serves nothing aside from momentarily gratify someone, making them feel superior or clever, or whatever.

I dabbled in the game of lies young in my life, and discovered very quickly how out of sync lies were to me, how detrimental they are to all involved, how they clutch at the chest creating friction. Lies beget more lies, and the time and energy expended trying to cover ones own butt is ridiculous.

To put it simply; lying is a waste of my time. I tend towards brutal honesty, and this isn't always intentional, as I do try to exercise diplomacy and tact, but I can be a bit like a bull in a proverbial china shop. Sometimes I will share something in the spirit of helping, and yet it will come out as judgmental or arrogant, and when I detect this with myself I immediately feel shamed, and will always apologize where necessary. I do hope I am mellowing with age, and becoming less invested in the reality and drama of those around me. I know that at times I share my two cents utterly unsolicited, and often it is best to just keep it to myself.

Words are powerful. And the way in which we use them is extremely creative, as we tend to manifest our reality based on how we express ourselves. If you express yourself in positive platitudes and lovey dovey notions without actions to back them up, you will find your empty words lead you to an empty life. And the same can be said of those who live in anger or judgment, as this type of expressing of oneself only attracts more negativity.

Like attracts like.

So when we use our words to express ourselves, it is always wisest to let the mind lead the tongue by at least a full second. This took me so many years to understand, and indeed even longer to begin to cultivate. It is a skill I still work on daily - I am not exactly known for my level headed emotional stability - I am a Pisces with an extremely tremulous grip on my feelings. So this second I give myself before speaking is something I exercise on a daily basis. Sometimes I allow this gracious process to lead me in my experiences with others, and I come out the other side of any contact feeling positive about my contribution. However, there are times when I will stick my foot in it, so to speak, and let my mouth flap before I really consider the gravity of what I'm about to say.

Every time I let my words out before measuring them, they end up weighing heavily on me. There is nothing quite so heart rending as to say something you know you'll never be able to take back. So I work ardently and humbly at mastering my wicked tongue :)

And I urge you to do the same; I truly do believe we can achieve world peace in our lifetime, as utterly hopeless as the notion seems in light of the way the world is turning right now. And I know that one of the many things we must do as individuals to reach a level of peace globally and collectively, is learn to temper ourselves as individuals first. A lot of the time we will speak out in a passionate moment, out of anger or hunger or fear, or whatever emotional turbo pack guides us in the moment, and we will say something which isn't true, or honest of who we really are, or isn't informed, or is just downright ugly. And then it's out there, and we can't take it back. And we're left feeling like a liar, while the person we have just bombarded with our words is left weighing their own feelings in the aftermath.

What is the point?

Does a few moments of egotistical arrogance really satisfy ones internal mechanisms? By telling someone how we "really feel" in no uncertain terms, no matter how it may affect them, are we creating a clean route of expression? Or are we just being bullies?

There is a sweet second, before a word is uttered, in which your beautiful computer-like brain can weigh your words and you will know immediately - yes speak it, or no - sit with it.

If you get a no - sit with it, then sit with it. And shut up. And bite your nasty little tongue. Because no ones heart is worth breaking, and no amount of apologizing can make up for below the belt statements. Truth is paramount to spiritual sovereignty, but there is a vast ocean between truth, and venom.

So let's be sure our words are true at all times, and yet there is no level of animosity within them, no vengeance, no ego stroking, no polarity playing. It is just not worth it to utter a word you can never take back, it hurts the one you speak it to, and it creates a gap within your own personal energy.

Be honest. And yet be compassionate.